Article: Spotlight: Words: Interesting concept

 
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Image Spotlight: Words
By Nancy Polanski on February 6, 2017

Sometimes all we need is a word or two.

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ImageZanymuse
Feb 5, 2017 7:56 PM CST
Name: Brenda Essig
Rio Dell, CA
I had to stop and think about this. I know it is true of almost everyone. I have often thought things like "I am not good enough because I am not _________". Fill in the blank with words like pretty, thin, smart, wise, funny, talented, and so on .

But I am unique, I am a good listener, I am empathetic, I am inquisitive, I am generous, I have skills and talents...

I have never been half as smart as I wanted to be, but I have realized I am twice as smart as I thought I was.
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Imagenap
Feb 6, 2017 5:18 AM CST
Name: Nancy
Buffalo NY

"Too many people overvalue what they are not and undervalue what they are."

Brenda, I have a smile on my face after reading your words because I have known you for a long time and you have shown me that you have all those qualities, and more. You are wise and witty and resourceful and humble, as well as everything else in your post. You are my favorite online friend. Lovey dubby
ImageZanymuse
Feb 6, 2017 9:10 AM CST
Name: Brenda Essig
Rio Dell, CA
Nancy, *Blush* What a sweet thing to say. Group hug
i have found many online friends to cherish and admire, but you my dear are my bff forever. Lovey dubby
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Imagevic
Feb 6, 2017 9:10 AM CST
Name: Vicki
North Carolina
I love your response too Zany and I would say I fit just about everything you said except for skills and talents. I don't have those.
NATIONAL GARDENING ASSOCIATION Purslane & Portulaca ~ Garden Art CUBITS Heart Strength ~ Trust in the Lord

ImageZanymuse
Feb 6, 2017 9:14 AM CST
Name: Brenda Essig
Rio Dell, CA
Vicki, I am certain that you have many skills and talents. Everyone does. Yours may be different than mine or the next guy/gal, but they are there and are worth celebrating. Lovey dubby
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Imagenap
Feb 6, 2017 10:01 AM CST
Name: Nancy
Buffalo NY
If you ask me, Vic, one of your most enviable talents is juggling! Juggling time. You fit more into a day than anyone I know. When you rattle off your daily accomplishments on the Friends' thread, I get tired just reading about it.
Imagevic
Feb 6, 2017 10:54 AM CST
Name: Vicki
North Carolina
*Blush* *Blush* *Blush* Thank You Both Lovey dubby Group hug Group hug
NATIONAL GARDENING ASSOCIATION Purslane & Portulaca ~ Garden Art CUBITS Heart Strength ~ Trust in the Lord

Mindy03
Feb 7, 2017 8:01 AM CST
Name: Margaret
Delta KY
I'm A Charley's Girl For Sure
When I read this quote I immediately thought of my mother in law.
She had her own special talents but was always trying to copy mine. She was always saying things. Like :it's good if you like : and
People will think I'm dumb:
It drove me crazy every single time she did those things.
Sometimes I wish I was more like other people but then I think NO, I'm the way God made me and He made me this way for a good reason so I'll move on past this moment in my life and just be me.
ImageZanymuse
Feb 7, 2017 8:54 AM CST
Name: Brenda Essig
Rio Dell, CA
Mindy, your mother in law sounds as if she was a very insecure person. She must have admired you to want to imitate you.

You are right to to follow the course set out for you and not try to be like someone else. (though that does not mean we shouldn't learn from others).
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Mindy03
Feb 7, 2017 12:15 PM CST
Name: Margaret
Delta KY
I'm A Charley's Girl For Sure
Zany she was insecure and while she did love me I'm afraid the copying off of me was more of a competition thing with her. She was always competing with me for my husbands attention in those kind of ways He was her baby so she had a hard time sharing him
ImageZanymuse
Feb 7, 2017 1:22 PM CST
Name: Brenda Essig
Rio Dell, CA
That type of mother in law makes me appreciate the fact that my husband was an orphan.
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Imagenap
Feb 7, 2017 3:12 PM CST
Name: Nancy
Buffalo NY
Mindy, moments of insecurity hit most of us at one time or another, don't you think? I have to admit that I have had thoughts like that at times, but fortunately they come and go rather spontaneously. Once they've passed, I wonder why I let it bother me.
Mindy03
Feb 7, 2017 6:55 PM CST
Name: Margaret
Delta KY
I'm A Charley's Girl For Sure
Mmmm well Nap it's not really insecurity at those moments. It's just I'm so different from every female I know that sometimes I wonder why I'm not more like other femme ales.
But then I think of all the things that make me different. Are the things that make me happy so I'm over it :
Imagenap
Feb 7, 2017 7:00 PM CST
Name: Nancy
Buffalo NY
You sound like a fairly contented soul, in spite of (or maybe because of) your perceived differences. God bless!
Imageaspenhill
Feb 8, 2017 9:59 AM CST
Name: Terri
Lucketts, VA
This spotlight quote really speaks to me. For most of my life I've been very hard on myself and this quote pretty much sums it up.

When your personality and the things you are interested in are not the same as the majority of the people that surround you, you tend to think that you are not "normal", not "good enough", but not enough to inspire you to expend energy on the typical things that would make you "fit in" better. The best thing that ever happened to me was finding out that there were people that did have similar personalities and interests, and the dawning realization that "normal" is subjective.

It is odd that I never came across similar people until much later in my adult life, but when I did, I was finally able to eradicate that persistent nagging feeling and I was able to truly enjoy who I was for the first time in my life. I finally discovered that not everybody likes crowds and parties and typical suburban living. I discovered people that enjoy peace and quiet, deep introspective thinking, and creativity in all its forms. I discovered that I AM social when there is conversation with people who's eyes don't glaze over when I talk about things like the latest house or garden project, or an idea for a new house or garden project, or just my observations on human nature. Brenda's fill in the blanks are what my fill in the blanks would be.

As a side note, does anyone know what their Myers Briggs personality type is, or even heard of Myers Briggs? It is something that is often done in the work place to determine the best mix of people for success with a project, or just in general gives a bit of insight into the effectiveness and/or happiness people have in their jobs. For what it is worth, mine is INFJ. Learning this was something else that finally started giving me a bit of peace about how seemingly different I was from the majority and embracing the things that I do well. Everyone has skills whether they realize it or not, and all things have their place Big Grin
“Surely as cometh the Winter, I know there are spring violets under the snow.” (Robert H. Newell)

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[Last edited Feb 8, 2017 10:11 AM CST]
Quote | Post #1235699 (15)
ImageZanymuse
Feb 8, 2017 10:15 AM CST
Name: Brenda Essig
Rio Dell, CA
Well said Terri. Thumbs up

I am Myers Briggs personality type INTJ according to this test. http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/jtypes2.asp
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[Last edited Feb 8, 2017 10:42 AM CST]
Quote | Post #1235704 (16)
Imagevic
Feb 8, 2017 10:20 AM CST
Name: Vicki
North Carolina
I think you and I are birds of a feather too Terri - but I find that I think like many folks here on Cubits. I do take the road less traveled and enjoy the peace and quiet of it.

I just took the test - we're close Terri - ISFJ
NATIONAL GARDENING ASSOCIATION Purslane & Portulaca ~ Garden Art CUBITS Heart Strength ~ Trust in the Lord

Imageaspenhill
Feb 8, 2017 12:43 PM CST
Name: Terri
Lucketts, VA
Vicki, it was on Dave's Garden, Cubits, and NGA where I finally found people who were similar to me. I think gardeners in general like being outside, like the peacefulness and satisfaction that comes with it, and are creative, so I enjoy the interaction. I have also noticed that almost all that I have come in contact with have strong and special feelings for their pets, which indicates to me a caring and empathetic nature. Going a step beyond that, I also think there is something about the writing medium of these online forums that give people a place to let their ideas out. Whether the writings are plainly stated or subtle, I think the people who are a bit more introspective are drawn to each other Thumbs up
“Surely as cometh the Winter, I know there are spring violets under the snow.” (Robert H. Newell)

NGA Blog..........Pinterest Boards..........Tablescaping Blog
Imagevic
Feb 8, 2017 12:54 PM CST
Name: Vicki
North Carolina
Zany - I didn't see that we cross posted - Amazing how close we all are, huh?

Terri - I totally agree Thumbs up Thumbs up
NATIONAL GARDENING ASSOCIATION Purslane & Portulaca ~ Garden Art CUBITS Heart Strength ~ Trust in the Lord

Imagenap
Feb 8, 2017 5:27 PM CST
Name: Nancy
Buffalo NY
ISFJ here. Same as Vic!

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