Name: Arlene Marshall Twin Lakes, IA & Orange, CA Zone 4B
Just got back from 2 weeks in CA and didn't do anything for myself. Tomorrow I will start back with my 'special stuff' for me first thing in the morning, including exercise, facial stuff . . the whole thing.
I find if I don't do it first in my day . . it doesn't get done.
me . . first.
* * * for so many years it was my children and husband first * * *
Yum Yum Divas ~ ~ "Most recipes are not invention . . . but evolutions"
Name: Candyce Fulford N of MA, E of VT, W of ME, S o Grandmother Extraordinaire
TwinLakesChef wrote:* * * for so many years it was my children and husband first * * *
It was the same for me as well! Up until about 8 years ago, I put myself last. As a young wife and parent, we probably believe that to put our husband and family first is a good thing. But, I slowly came to realize that if I didn't love myself first, and take care of myself first, I could not love and take care of others. It was a hard lesson to learn.
I've recently begun to pamper myself. I spent 18 years raising my son alone, working long hours, and now another 9 years "raising" my disabled mother (much harder than raising a child!), and trying to do everyone else's projects. I never did anything for myself, neglected myself to the point of developing some serious health issues.
Within the last couple of years, I've finally said, OK, now it's my turn. I've begun saying no to other people's projects so I could work on my own. I am quite surprised at how many friends I lost when I said "no".
I grew up with a mother who never did anything fun, rarely laughed, never pampered herself because it was "a waste of money", never treated herself to anything luxurious. And it dawned on me a couple of years ago that I had become just like my mother. I lived to get thru the day, felt guilty if I bought anything "fun", never splurged on a vacation or new furniture or anything.
I've begun slowing down and treating myself. I spent some "real" money on some Jennifer Lopez perfume, which I love. I didn't buy the imitation stuff at the dollar store. I get at least one hour-long massage a month, which is therapeutic on so many levels. For the last two months, I've splurged and get the hour-long massage and three 30-minute massages during the month. I had a massage today and planned to work on my fence this afternoon. But after the massage, I felt so good I decided to just do nothing the rest of the day but enjoy the day. So you see where I ended up. LOL
We have to pamper ourselves in some way regularly. It rejuvenates the soul and gives us momentum. When we respect ourselves enough to treat ourselves kindly, we are better people for all the people in our lives.