cindi this has gone beyond anything resembling logic. my mother really does not like her children and the main reason is who our father is. i have chosen to let the whole thing be funny'r'n heck due to the ridiculous factor. and...... i have taken to likening myself to the worst of the hillman characters really trying to make my mother laugh a little about the hillmans. both were brother and sister. neither ever married and both lived alone in little shack-like houses. one ....andrew.......whom we were told was ander was a sweet little old man who served in ww2 and walked or hitchhiked anywhere he went who would give me pennies every time i saw him as a girl.......and the other i avoided like the plague because she scared me to death. she had kerosene lighting. in a little shack. in the middle of the woods. on a dirt road named hillman road. and loved to get a table full of kids together on a dark night and relate her stories of panthers and unlucky children. she had a funny eye squint. no teeth. but ate quince. named queenie. you ever ate a quince? hard as a brick.
my mama is really kind of like her own mother. in grandma's last years you found yourself asking..........is she that mean or that crazy? from where i sit it is all because neither of them were ever able to just look you in the eye and say..........i need you to do something for me. or no i dont' want that. or yes let's do do that. and it was the way they were taught. girls were not supposed to have problems or needs and if they did have a problem or a need then they needed to suck it up because the man's problems or needs was the only thing that mattered. my papa that e.v. my daughter is named after was not a mean man but my grandma;'s father was evil. also one of the sons of the family had epilepsy. they kept him shut in and my grandma would treat him like he was an imbicile. and clearly hated him. his name was cliff and he wrote off for a chet akin guitar teaching book and taught himself to play the guitar and to sing the songs of chet akin. i was little but i knew enough to know that the words he was telling me he was singing from the book were not the words that were in the book. he was very dark skinned. there was rumors of indian blood being in grandma's family. and also incest. so i cut my mama some slack. and my grandmother. the last time i saw my grandma she told me she was seeing an admiral in the navy and that he had taken her onto his ship and up in alaska where they got off the boat there was a throng of people waiting to see them. lots more went with that. a grand time was had by all. she didn't know when i could meet him.
when i am faced with someone or something that just hates my guts for something i can't do anything about or like when rosie was little and she'd get that look in her eye and squinch up her nose giving me a split second notice that she was fixing to annihilate me. my response is to "bust" out laughing. i can't help it. the worse it gets the more i laugh. i can't stop myself. i laugh so hard i pee in my pants. that is a very hillman trait.
aw mama loves us but it is hard for her to be with anyone because she really is ocd and us doing anything different from the way she does it drives her crazy. she's 80. and lives alone. linda and e.v. stayed 2 days after everyone left and they washed walls and chairs and floors but mama told them she would get to her cleaning just as soon as they were gone.
and besides i was not feeling sorry for myself.......just so you know..........i really do find humor in our situation. i mean who else has a mama that holds the kids daddy against the kids and tells them so to their face like they are supposed to change that.
has anyone ordered anything that they wish i would hurry up and ship? i was sort of waiting on the hydrangea.......delayed until next week......to begin shipping again but if anyone is ready let me know. otherwise i'll probably just laze around while the water level goes down. lol.
susan did you get there ok?
also folks who ordered zulu flame those are in and i will ship those next week as well.
I am home and still falling down on my job here. I have printed everything out (payments,etc.) but to tell you the truth, I can't see it. My eyes are really bad right now and I don't know why. It is very depressing.
We got even more rain this morning, at least we aren't flooding up here. Everything is growing like gang busters, and so are the mosquitoes.
I really need people that have gotten their plants and have not paid, to send me a cmail, and tell me. and even if you have paid, I probably haven't marked it, so you can cmail me too.
I am going to try to send out a blast, but that will require some thought on my part, and my brain is not functioning well atm.
Hope all the Texas people are OK and not washed away.
Ditto here. All squared away.
So glad I got things in the ground before I left because there's no gardening in this mud!
Gives me a chance to finish indoor projects. My new knee is delayed so I'll be hobbling until end of June, and no gardening at all for a long time after that. There's a stack of books calling my name, looking forward to that!
The BEST!!! I can't believe how much larger roses and iris bloom up there. Made mine look puny.
The best part of the trip was being surrounded by plant geeks for a whole week. I finally felt like I was with my tribe. It was the feeling of truly being home. I don't know how to explain it other than to say when I stood out in the middle of those fields of flowers, I felt at one with the universe.
Cindi I missed that..........where did you go that you got to spend a full week with gardening people?? I had a plant roundup with some dear gardening friends from that "other" gardening website where most of us started out - and I had a blast. But, our Roundups usually only last for a day. A week of gardening friends sounds Awesome!